You Suck At Love

We started off incredible

Connection undeniable

I swear I thought you were the one forever

But your love was like a loaded gun

You shot me down like everyone

'Cause everyone's replaceable

When you're just so incapable

Of getting past skin deep

You played me like an amateur

Then stabbed me like a murderer

I'm left for dead, another one of your victims

It's not like you're unpredictable

But your act is so believable

I know it's nothing personal, it's just business as usual

You're good at what you do

Now I kinda feel bad for you

You're never gonna know

what it's like to have someone to turn to

Another day, another bed

It's just a game inside your head

Guess what, another game over

I got burned, but you're the real loser

I don't know why I've wasted my time with you

You're bad news, a history repeater

You can't trust a serial cheater

You're good at hooking up but you suck at love

Jet Lag

Not sure why...but i really like this song...

What time is it where you are?

I miss you more than anything

Back at home you feel so far

Waitin' for the phone to ring

It's gettin’ lonely livin’ upside down

I don't even wanna be in this town

Tryin' to figure out the time zones makin' me crazy

You say good morning

When it's midnight

Going out of my head

Alone in this bed

I wake up to your sunset

And it's driving me mad

I miss you so bad

And my heart, heart, heart is so jetlagged

Heart, heart, heart is so jetlagged

Heart, heart, heart is so jetlagged

What time is it where you are?

Five more days and I'll be home

I keep your picture in my car

I hate the thought of you alone

I've been keepin' busy all the time

Just to try to keep you off my mind

Tryin' to figure out the time zones makin’ me crazy

I miss you so bad

I wanna share your horizon

I miss you so bad

And see the same sunrising

I miss you so bad

Turn the hour hand back to when you were holding me...

Weird... =.=

Left Me Alone..

I seriously dont get some people...in high school,for years i've been suffering inside and since i was little,i have trouble in telling people how i felt...

I just kept to myself...then,a few people came as saw how troubled i was...back then,they keep asking me,"r u ok?"...i kept looking the other way...but i learned to share my problems little by litlle...but then,once,a few people got fed up with me and just left...but they came back but i have trouble sharing with them my problems again...

But as soft as i can be,i forgave them and let them back in my heart cause they keep telling me that they're 'there for me'...but now,they just left me again...so,who's fault is it now? is it still my fault cause i cant always look at the positive side? or them cause giving me hope? there's one thing that is clear in my mind and that is,if they dont want to help,why bother asking and helping years ago? just let me be alone then as they let me alone now...i seriously cant get them...cant they keep their words? i dont even know what to believe...if u dont want to help,then just let them be in the first place....dont give any sentimental words...

1st semester of FIS..

Finally....6 months have felt like forever! dah mula cuti...but 3 minggu je....aiyo...things have really been tough...i have to pick myself up alone so many times...felt like form 1 all over again...crying everynight...all the screaming...getting angry very easily...

things really have been crazy...i felt people abandoned me...they said,they'll be there if i ever needed them...guess those are just words...so called friends? since i was little,i was already fighting for myself...since i am the only boy...and i dont want my sisters to fight for me...they already got their hands full...kena hina dengan cikgu...senior...junior...'kawan'...musuh...all of that,i handled it myself...but along the way,and some that are still with me,stand by my side...and they know i had a rough life and i dont want to bother them...not many left...but im really thankful that they're still here,talking to me...and wanted to help...i never asked for help...if i think i can handle it alone...

even if i cant,i'll always try to find a way...i just cant believe people can say i never fight for myself...i know people cant accept me...because im really damaged...i have to many problems that i cant solve for myself...and because of that,im always confuse...i've always wanted people to accept me...but if they cant,i know why...

and i also want my friends to just support me...if they cant give me any advice...i dont blame them...this is my problems...i've always kept things to myself...now,i just dont know what to believe anymore...

so,cant i really fend for myself? that's what i want to know...is it wrong for me to seek for help? but this 1st semester,i met new people...who i just can talk...who barely knows about my past...but still willing to help...even if i dont ask for it...some dont even let me be alone...some likes to pick fights...some tried to supprt me...but i really appreciate what they've done so far...it has been a fun semester...and i hope we can have another one like this next semester...i dont think i would have stop being alone if it werent for them...so,thank you...

Deserve?

I read an article a few days ago about people being unhappy...and that article really made me think that i myself decided not to be happy...

It is also stated that when people decided that they don't want to be happy because they don't want to get their hopes up and get disappointed again...but it is not true?

Sometimes i just really wish that i could just stay in my room and never come out...sometimes i feel like i don't even want to see anyone...

What if i'm happy but others are not? eh Annisa? I rather be unhappy than to see her unhappy...

I don't even deserve to have people like this around me...they are to kind...after what i've done,i don't deserve anything...

Believe Me

I don't want to be the one to blame
You like fun and games
Keep playing em
I'm just saying
Think back then
We was like one and the same
On the right track
But I was on the wrong train
Just like that
Now you've got a face to pain
And the devil's got a fresh new place to play
In your brain like a maze you can never escape the rain
Every damn day is the same shade of grey

Hey
I used have a little bit of a plan
Used to
Have a concept of where I stand
But that concept slipped right out of my hands
Now I don't really even know who I am
Yo, what do I have to say
Maybe I should do what I have to do to break free
What ever happens to you, we'll see
But it's not gonna happen with me

I guess
That this is where we've come to
If you don't want to
Then you don't have to believe me
But I won't be there when you go down
Just so you know now
You're on your own now believe me

Back then, I thought you were just like me
Somebody who could see all the pain I see
But you proved to me unintentionally
That you would self-destruct eventually
Now I'm thinking like the mistake I made doesn't hurt
But it's not gonna work
Cause it's really much worse than I thought
I wished you were something that you were not
And now this guilt is really all that I got

You turned your back
And walked away in shame
All you got is a memory of pain
Nothing makes sense so you stare at the ground
I hear your voice in my head when no one else is around
What do I have to say
Maybe I should do what I have to do to break free
What ever happens to you, we'll see
But it's not gonna happen with me

He's so gone..

Insecure
In his skin
Like a puppet, a boy on a string

Broke away
Learned to fly
If you want him back, gotta let him shine

Here I am
This is me
And I'm stronger than you ever thought I'd be

Are you shocked?
Are you mad?
That you're missing out on who I really am

Now it looks like the joke's on you
'Cause the boy that you thought you knew

He's so gone
That's so over now
He's so gone
You won't find him around
You can look but you won't see
The boy I used to be
'Cause he's
so gone away
Like history
He's so gone